So… gainining 13lbs in a week isn’t fun!

Things have been pretty busy lately. It all started the weekend before last when my friend and I decided to visit another friend of mine that lives in the Philly area. The weekend was full of girl-time and shopping… I had a blast! During this trip, I thought a lot about how if my friend had suggested the visit 18 months ago, I wouldn’t have gone. Why? Well, there are a lot of things I would’ve been concerned about because of my weight that would’ve prevented me from going, here are a few:

• Riding for 3 1/2 hours in my friends tiny car – would I even fit? I KNOW the seatbelt wouldn’t have.
• Sleeping on a full-size air mattress with my friend – we wouldn’t have fit and I probably would’ve popped it… literally!
• Walking around ALL DAY at the outlet malls and being in physical pain
• Are people in the “fancy normal size people” stores be looking at me and wondering “What is she doing here?!?!”
• Going shopping at the outlet malls all day, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to buy anything.
• Breaking my friend’s toilet, dining room chairs, hell – even her living room furniture

The list could probably go on and on… but the good news is that I’m living a life now where I don’t need to worry about these kinds of things and let me tell you, it’s incredibly freeing!

The bad news is that this girl-time (with lots of eating/drinking wine) set off another 5 days of eating/drinking whatever I wanted while I traveled for work. I ended my week long road trip in south-central PA with my cousin’s wedding last Saturday and finally I drove myself home.

When I left for the girl’s trip in Philly on a Friday evening, I had weighed in at my all-time low weight of 193.8lbs. When I weighed-in on Sunday (something I really didn’t want to do, but I forced myself to do because I REFUSE to put my head in the sand and ignore my weight), the scale said 206.4lbs. That’s right… an  increase of 13 lbs!

Seriously, how in the hell does a person gain 13 lbs in a single week? This is the story of my life! I realize this isn’t 13 lbs of fat, but I do know some of the weight gain was real. I made an observation on a forum thread reply earlier this week that I think is worth repeating.

What I’ve learned about my body is that it is incredibly sensitive to poor eating and I believe this is a major factor in why I’ve given up so easily in the past on previous attempts to lose weight. I would lose maybe 20 lbs… have a few bad days and get back on the scale to find 6 or 7 lbs gained back. At the time, I got upset, irrational, discouraged, and didn’t consider the fact that these lbs could come right back off if I could just get right back on track. Instead… I gave up!

I’m grateful to know this about myself now. When I saw the 206.4 lbs on the scale, I didn’t panic… but I was worried enough to say “Ok… get yourself together!” and I got right back on plan on Sunday. I feel as though I became just the right amount of “worried” – I didn’t panic and feel guilty, but I didn’t just shrug my shoulders and say “Oh, I’m just retaining water!”

I’m happy to say that when I weighed in this morning, I was 197.6 lbs. So, just like the weight shot up, it has shot back down about 9 lbs in the last 4 days. The goal now is to try and get back to that 193 lbs and then go back to my plan of maintaining my weight during my stressful summer. I’m going to focus on being more consistent in maintaining – rather than either being strictly on plan or completely “off the rails” with my eating and drinking of calories!

Here is a pic of myself and my little cousin at the wedding and also a selfie in the mirror the other day!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Plastic Surgery Consult #1

Yesterday was my first plastic surgery consult. Although I sent pictures to Dr. Sauceda in Mexico for a quote, I haven’t actually spoken with a plastic surgeon directly regarding body contouring surgery. My appointment yesterday was with Dr. Joseph Capella in Ramsey, NJ. I have heard so many great things about him and his work looks excellent (from the pictures I have seen online) so I thought I would check him out! Ramsey isn’t necessarily CLOSE to me, but I figured the 4 hour drive would worth it if I could finally feel whole again after the removal of all of the excess skin!

I have heard so many great things about Dr. Capella as a person and how he has an excellent bedside manner. Still, I was not prepared for how absolutely incredible he was in person. No joke… I may have fallen in love with him a little bit HA HA! I haven’t met too many physicians in my life that are down to earth and friendly – let alone a surgeon. He was so incredibly kind, patient, and encouraging. He was so pleasant and smiling the entire time I was there and he was just so genuine. Clearly he is a very talented and intelligent man.

The good news: he thinks I’m an excellent candidate for surgery. He estimated that he would remove about 10 lbs through the breast lift, extended arm lift, and lower body lift procedures. I realize that is not just pure skin, some fat will come off with it… but after losing 250 lbs, my body is a mess and I’m so looking forward to feeling good about myself with the clothes OFF! Dr. Capella was very impressed with my weight loss and the fact that my body was in really good shape – especially considering I’ve lost 250 lbs. He doesn’t feel that I need to lose any more weight either – regardless of my “overweight” status on a BMI chart. I was happy to hear that since I was worried he might say “You need to lose 20 more lbs before I’ll operate on you!”

He said he would do surgeries in two stages. First, the surgeries I mentioned above. Although he doesn’t think I’ll need more than a breast lift and that I may not want/need an inner thigh lift after the first round, he said he could do those two procedures separately after 3 months of healing from the others. If I end up being the 34C he anticipates when all is said and done, I wouldn’t care about implants… I guess my only worry is that my breasts would be lifted, but not look “full” – fullness is all I care about, not necessarily having a bigger chest. I’m unsure as to what I think about the thigh lift… I think I still might need it… but we’ll wait and see.

I was so convinced I would have to take the trip to Mexico and have everything done – but to be honest, I think I’d rather stay close to home and have my work done by Dr. Capella earlier – even if it means I can’t get a thigh lift done due to money and time off work. That’s how great he was and how great his work looks – at least in my eyes. He was also just so enthusiastic about giving me great results. He said repeatedly (with a huge smile), “I think you will be so happy with your results, I really think we can get you exactly what you’re looking for” and it really was very comforting. Comfort isn’t enough though…. if his work wasn’t amazing, I wouldn’t let his charisma alone convince me lol!

I’m hoping to have this done at the end of September – earlier than the December timeframe I originally planned. If I didn’t have to travel all the way to Mexico and go when my husband could be off (he’s a teacher) then there is no point in waiting – in my opinion. Like I said in my last post, I want to have kids within the next couple of years… so I have to finish with the “me time” and self improvement projects before priorities change lol!

So excited!!

One Year Surgiversary! 248.4lbs Lighter and Loving Life!

Today marks the one year anniversary since my VSG surgery. WOW! The time has flown by so fast. I really couldn’t have asked for a better year. I started the six month supervised diet at 444.2 lbs and today I weighed in at my all-time low of 195.8lbs. In the year since surgery, I’ve lost 142.2 lbs, overall I’m down 248.4 lbs in 18 months. Some days I can’t even believe it!

So, what’s new with me? Well… as some of you may know the past few months have been a struggle. I don’t have the motivation to be super strict with my eating anymore and I currently sit about 20 lbs away from my original goal weight. Yes, it’s a bit frustrating for me to know that if I could have stayed strong (mentally) a bit longer, I could’ve been where I ultimately wanted to be by now. I tortured myself for awhile with this fact, but in the past couple of weeks I’ve decided to let it go. I’ve increased my calories (not because I think that’ll help me lose the weight, but because I’ve been actually hungry). I’m losing – slow and steady!

In the past month, I’ve taken two trips – one work and one personal. I travel a lot for work and I’ve always done well with planning/packing meals; however, these two trips were by plane… where I had no access to a car and no control over the food that was made available to me. What a challenge! I made some good choices and then I made some conscious choices to make bad choices (lol), and during each trip I came back to probably a 5-7 lb gain. YIKES!

It is scary to see how quickly the weight can pile on in just 4-5 days. It’s a good reminder for me that it wouldn’t be that hard to get myself back to that dark place where I was 400+ lbs. Thankfully, most of that weight is not “real” gain… so it comes off quickly; however, it is still a lot of work and a bit scary.

Thankfully, through therapy over the past year or so, I’ve learned not to feel the guilt and anxiety of a bit of a fall “off the wagon” and it really helps get me back on track. I mean, when you think about it… what’s the point of beating yourself up endlessly over something that is over and done with? Coming to this realization and letting go of that guilt has really served me well with getting back on track and doing what I need to do in order to maintain (which is essentially what I’ve been doing for the past 3 months).

What I have learned in the past year? That I don’t have anything figured out that’s for sure! What I do know is I’m so grateful to feel happier, healthier, and more confident. I have completely changed the way I approach my life. It’s a great feel and I hope it never ends! The downside to losing the weight? I can’t really think of one in particular – but I have noticed some insecurities coming through from my husband. Maybe I’ll write more on that later sometime!

So what’s next for me? I’m going to continue on path to very slow losses/maintenance. Maybe someday when the craziness of my full-time job, consulting business, and graduate school go away I will be able to put all of that motivation and mental energy back into faster weight loss. For now, I’m incredibly happy!

Tomorrow, I have a plastic surgery consult with Dr. Joseph Capella in New Jersey. I know what some of you may already be thinking, “It’s too early for you to be considering plastics.” but the fact is that I’m almost 29 years old with no children and I want them. I also know that I want plastic surgery. There is no way I’m going to be able to afford it after having children – at least not for many, many years and after losing almost 250 lbs… the waiting is just not going to happen. If I want to start a family, I need to get the ball rolling… so plastic consults here I come! Hopefully I can make it happen at the end of the year. I’ll update everyone on how the appointment goes! 🙂

Now for the pics!!! 🙂

BEFORE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CURRENT!