“BodPod” Body Fat % Testing Results

So for awhile now, I’ve been wanting to get a testing of my body fat percentage to have a better understanding of how much of me actually is fat and how much of me is all the other stuff! Yesterday, I completed a BodPod test which calculated my fat and fat-free measurements, as well as calculating my resting metabolic rate.

So, the results were in – and it only took about 5 minutes! I was actually pretty disappointed with the results and I’m not sure why. I know that I’m still overweight and there is plenty of fat left on me. I didn’t expect to be in a normal range, but I guess I thought I might be closer? Here were my results:

  • Total Weight – 200.1 lbs
  • Body Fat % – 36.5% (73.03 lbs)
  • Lean % – 63.5% (126.97 lb)
  • Resting Metabolic Rate (RMR) Estimate – 1,772 kcal/day
  • Total Energy Expenditure (TEE) Estimate – 2,142 kcal/day

From the information I was given, here are the body fat % categories or women:

  • Elite Fitness – 15-18.9%
  • Athlete – 19 – 22.9%
  • Average – 23 – 29.9%
  • Excess Fat (Overweight) – 30 – 39.9%
  • Risk (Obesity) – 40% & Up

So, according to the chart, I’m in the middle of the “overweight” range. I guess that makes sense… I’m not sure why I’m surprised. I guess I’d love to pretend that I’m almost done with losing weight LOL! What was interesting is that if I were to be able to maintain my lean mass at 127ish lbs, then the 23-30% weight range for my body would be about 165 – 183ish. According simply to a BMI chart, the very TOP of a health weight range for me would be 174. So, this does give me an idea of where I could be considered “healthy” when taking my body fat % into account. Of course, that is only if I lose fat and not some of the muscle.

I’m not really sure where to go from here with this information; however, I’m glad that I did it. I feel as though body fat % will help me to better determine a realistic weight for me in the future, so maybe I will plan to do it again in 4-5 months and see where I’m at. Until then, I’m going to try to keep eating lean, stay healthy with exercise, and try to lose 1.5-2 lbs per week. Perhaps by my one year anniversary of surgery 10 1/2 weeks from now, I will find myself calling “goal!” For now.. I’m just happy the ONDERLAND hump is over, assuming the scale doesn’t move in the wrong direction on Monday! On that note, I’m starting to really like the not getting on the scale every morning. In fact, yesterday and today I didn’t even think about it – so freeing! Hopefully this will help my to stop obsessing and start trying to live life like a normal person!!

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After 15 Months, 4 Days, and 245lbs Lost…. I am in ONDERLAND!! (w/ pic)

Ok, so if you heard some crazy person “wooohooooo-ing” and celebrating this morning…. it was probably ME yelling all the way from Central PA!!! Why? Because as the title of my post states, 15 months and 4 days (who’s counting??) after starting my journey to a healthier, happier, life – I am in “ONDERLAND” at 199.2 lbs after losing EXACTLY 245 lbs.

As you  may or may not know, I’ve been going CRAZY over the scale and have really been struggling to get it to move for awhile now. On Wednesday, I decided to pull myself together, try to get really strict again with the eating, and I gave the scale batteries to my husband so I would stop the obsessive weighing. Although my eating was not perfect for those 4 days… it just goes to show that tightening up is important because I finally got to where I wanted to be!

I cannot be happier today. I do realize that it is just a “number on the scale” but it really does mean a lot to me. When I started, I never thought I would actually get here. This is the weight I was at about 10 1/2 years ago and it was my heaviest weight in high school. When I got a physical for the upcoming basketball season and I saw “200” on the scale, it scared me into losing 30 lbs down to 170 which is where I was at when I graduated. When I started college, the emotional eating went out of control and I ended up 444.2 lbs.

I never want to go back to that life. Things are so much better now. While I will say that losing weight doesn’t guarantee happiness in a person’s life…. it really made my great life as close to perfect as it could possibly be. I am so grateful to have this second chance – I really hope that I don’t blow it. I will NEVER say “X amount of lbs gone forever” because I know better…. I know just how easy it is to start gaining, head down a dark path, and live in a scary place called denial.

Where do I go from here? Well, I’m going to continue to try and be strict with my diet. If I fall off that wagon, so to speak, then I’m just going to get back up and try again. I’d still like to hit the high end of a “normal BMI” at 174ish lbs however, we’ll see how that goes! I’m going to do the BodPod testing to get an idea of what my body fat % is and then reassess. I would be happy if I spent the rest of my life at this weight; however, I do want to be as healthy as possible – especially since I’d like to start a family in the next couple of years!

I’m hoping to meet my goal of finishing the Couch25k app by the end of this week (end of Feb.) I have already ran one day of Week 9 for 30 minutes and it was exciting! I hope to run my first 5K in mid-April! I NEVER in a million years thought I would be able to finish the app when I started it 3 months ago!

So, I know I just posted a before and “during” photo the other day and I’m being a bit of an attention whore – but here is another! I bought this dress – a size 12 – over the weekend and to celebrate this BIG scale victory, I’m wearing it at work today. I feel like I could take over the world LOL!!

BEFORE – 444 lbs!

OnderlandBeforePics

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“DURING” – 199.2 lbs

Nikke_BlueDress_02242014

Have you ever just needed a mental slap? An update w/ a pic!

So, as anyone that has read my posts in the past two months, you know that I’ve been having a rough time. The weight loss has slowed down, hunger has come back, and I’ve been feeling some “diet fatigue” as well. A little over a week ago, I wrote a 9 month update and so many of you were so kind to offer words of encouragement and support! THANK YOU!

I often post updates in a few places. I always write on my blog, ObesityHelp.com forums, and the Sassy Sleevers Facebook group as well. When reading some of the responses to my last post, a few people made similar comments that sort of provided a mental slap for me. The comments were along the lines of “I would be so happy if I was where you are at – I hope I can get there” as well as “I wouldn’t care if I weighed 202 if I was able to run for 28 minutes and looked like you.” There was a pre-op patient at my local support group meeting that is starting around my starting weight of 444 lbs. She was telling me the same thing, “I just want to get to where you are” and she almost had tears in her eyes when she was saying it. It really was the “mental slap” I needed as I was so blown away by all of these comments. They were so kind and helpful to me… and they really got me thinking, “WTF! 18 months ago if I had seen the “me” of now on the street or at a gym running on the treadmill I would’ve killed to look like that and be healthy.”

So, the mental slap got me thinking – why am I giving myself such a hard time!? I have come so far and the old me would’ve killed to be where I am at now. I ran on the treadmill for 30 minutes straight for crying out loud!! Why am I torturing myself with feeling like I’m not doing well enough? Like I said, I never could have DREAMED in a million years that I would be where I am right now. It’s surreal actually… so why am I obsessing over the scale and SO worried about not being  “hardcore” anymore?

I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m going to continue to try to be strict with my diet to continue losing until I get to my goal – which at this point stands at around 174. If it doesn’t happen on a particular day or a single meal, I’m going to dust myself off and just keep on trying and that’s really the most I can ask for… I will not give up and I’m going to work REALLY hard to stop obsessing over the scale. In fact, I took the batteries out of the scale on Wednesday evening and gave them to my husband. Tomorrow evening (Sunday) he’s going to give them back to me so that I can weigh on Monday morning. Staying off the scale has been freeing – so I’m hoping to give the batteries right back to him Monday morning. I also gathered up all the Quest Bars in the house and made him take them to work to keep in his office. Until I get a grip on myself, there is no need for them in the house!!

Here is a pic of me in a dress that I hope to wear to a wedding in 7 weeks. It “fits” right now (meaning I can get it on) – but I’m hoping to drop some more weight before then so that it looks better on me! If you haven’t seen a “before” picture of me… I suggest taking a look and then maybe you can understand the big dorky smile I have on my face LOL!

FLWeddingDress_02222014

9 Months Post-Op: Feeling Discouraged and Defeated

Today marks 9 months since surgery and while I’m still incredibly grateful for this second chance at life and for all the ways my life has changed in the past 15 months (start of supervised diet), I am feeling a little bit discouraged and defeated today.

The weight loss has definitely slowed. This “month” I lost 4.4 lbs and I’m not happy about it. I’ve been eating more as I’ve been dealing with a lot more hunger – which I’ve talked about lately. I seem to be lacking the strength and hardcore mentality that I had for so long. I knew that the last 25-30 lbs would be the hardest – but I guess I wasn’t as mentally prepared as I thought!

The hardest part for me is that I’ve wanted to get into “onderland” so badly, yet I lose weight and then the scale jumps 1.5 lbs up overnight…. then I lose for a few days and then gain for two – even when I’m eating the same things. I know that if I want to get into onderland, I have the control – and I just need to tighten up. But, yet I can’t see to make myself get super strict again with my diet? It’s definitely a tough thing I have sort out. I have to ask myself, “How bad do I want this?!” but have been putting off the question…

I’ve also been having a rougher time when looking in the mirror and seeing the excess skin. For almost 3 months now I’ve been lifting weights and running. It’s torture to see glimpses of the body that I could have underneath the skin (that I’ve been working hard to improve) and know that without costly and painful surgery, I’m never going to see it fully. Again, another thing I thought I was prepared for, but I guess I wasn’t as prepared as I thought!

Maybe it’s the weather? Maybe it’s just mental fatigue? I feel like a baseball player that has struck out dozens of times in a row – I’m in a slump! I guess the good news is that I”m one Week 8 of the Couch25K app – never in a million years did I think I could run for 28 minutes straight. When I started the app, I had SERIOUS doubts that I would ever finish it – and here I am closing in on that goal. It’s a good feeling and something I’m trying to hang on to lately.

Here are my before and “during” progress pics this month!

Z11_Front Z11_Left Z11_Right Z11_Back

My head is spinning and I need to get it on straight!

I thought I would check-in with everyone since it has been a little while. I have a lot of random thoughts, so I figured that instead of trying to make too much sense out of them, I’ll just throw them all out there at you 🙂

First, it’s amazing to me how losing a lot of weight can change you and the way people react to you. I know there are a lot of people that say, “Losing weight didn’t change me, my personality, my relationships with others, or my life one bit!” and if that’s TRULY the case it’s not something I can relate to – but that’s great if you’re happy!

So, how has my life changed? Well, first off… I can’t tell you the last time I opened a door in public LOL! What I mean is that I’m sure I’ve talked about how poorly I’ve been treated by strangers in the past – whether they are making animal noises at me as I walk by a downtown bar with outdoor seating, or yelling things out their car window at me as they drive by, OR letting doors slam in my face when they walk into a convenience store or any other public building and I’m behind them. Let me tell you that NONE of these things are the case anymore.

I haven’t been publicly shamed in a long time and I’ve noticed a lot of men hold the door open for me when I walk into places. I’m not just talking about holding the door open for me when I’m right behind them either… I’m talking about standing there and holding the door open for me when I’m not even close to it yet lol. I mean, we all know that there is a certain distance that someone can be behind you when walking into a store where it would be socially acceptable for you to not hold the door open for them. I’ve noticed men standing there for an inordinate amount of time holding the door waiting for me to get to it. I find it very interesting. Does that bother me? Maybe on some level – only because I know that a year ago this was NOT the case – and certainly not my experience at all while I was heavy. But, I mostly find it interesting and fascinating!

My interactions with people seem to be different too; however, I think this is partly due to the change in my personality. At work functions, I’m much more likely to carry on conversations with people, I do act more confidently in meetings and people seem to be responding to it. This probably has a lot to do with my increase in confidence – I smile much more and I carry myself differently. I’m also not as concerned about what people must be thinking about how I look when they are interacting with me. All of the changes are positive ones and I can say with confidence, at least so far, that being thinner, healthier, and (looking better) does not have any negatives LOL

So, on to the not so fun part. I have really been struggling mentally lately. I’ve talked a little bit about this. The scale has not been moving very quickly at all and while I thought I was prepared for it, I guess I wasn’t. Not only am I losing more slowly (but still losing overall), my weight has been incredibly erratic from day to day – which is why I’ve said that I’m trying to stop weighing myself everyday – which has not been successful.

My hunger is also back. Hunger is not like it was before surgery, but since about 6 1/2 months out, I have been feeling true, physical hunger – coupled with an increase in capacity. I have increased my calories because of these factors and I know this is a main reason for the slow loss (coupled with the fact that I just have less to lose now!) My husband said to me the other day, “If you’re going to eat more, then you can’t expect to keep losing so quickly” and he’s 100% correct. So, I know I need to either go back to eating under 800 calories and less than 25-30g carbs like I was before, or I can keep doing what I’m doing and come to terms with the fact that the loss is going to go incredibly slow from now on and it will take me awhile to reach my goal.

The truth is that I’m not sure I have it in me anymore to be as strict as I was for the first 14 months of this journey. I really really do want to get to goal as soon as possible; however, I don’t know if that desire is stronger than my mental exhaustion from being so obsessed with doing things perfectly for 14 months and not straying from my path even the slightest bit. This is the internal struggle that I am having – wanting to get below 200 (I’m STILL hovering over it – ARGHHH!) and eventually to 180 or even 170 but also not having the mental strength to remain so incredibly focused. My whole life for 14 months completely revolved around this whole process and honestly, I want to let go a little bit.

What does “letting go” mean? I’m not sure. What it does NOT mean is quitting going to the gym, tracking my food, aiming for my protein/water goals, and striving to lose weight. It’s scary though because I feel like if I’m not 100000% super strict like I was before, than that must mean I’m giving up and being a quitter – right? That’s what my “all or nothing” irrational brain keeps telling me which is why I’m mentally struggling. Maybe letting go means not letting losing weight and food consume my thoughts 24/7. Maybe it means not getting worked up over eating more than 800 calories if I’m feeling true hunger? I guess this is something I have to figure out…

Just admitting these feelings makes me feel a bit weak and as if I’m giving up. I know that isn’t the case, so then why do I feel this way? I don’t know how it’s possible to feel like a success and a failure at the same time. I don’t know how it’s possible to feel so motivated and yet so defeated at the same time either…. I have a feeling it’s going to take me awhile to sort all of this out!